Blog.

The Not-So-Sexy Side of Goal Setting

Alone In The World

I was teaching a Grade 8 Economics Class for Junior Achievement last Friday.

Our first activity of the morning was a goal setting exercise.

Goal Setting.

Simple Goal Setting.

You put your goal in the top of the pyramid broken into 4 sections and reverse engineer your goal back to daily habits that you must take to reach your goal.

Simple.

Right?

It’s much harder than it looks.

First of all you have to know what exactly it is that you want.

So, here is where ummmmm 80-90% of us fail.

We fail to even know what it is we really want.

(It makes financial planning or any planning extremely difficult!)

We would stare at a blank piece of paper all day.

It would probably be easier to fill the “goal” section with what we don’t want, copy someone else’s or some half-assed goal we really don’t care about but think we “should” do.

We have that figured out what we DON’T WANT in spades, but to actually pinpoint the thing we WANT is incredibly difficult.

We end up borrowing other people’s goals all the time.

  • run a marathon
  • make a million
  • save a million
  • pay off your mortgage/debt
  • lose weight
  • get married
  • have kids
  • have a white picket fence
  • a dog?
  • etc.etc.etc.

I mean, really, is this what we want?

Fake it till you make it doesn’t work with Other People’s Goals.

The easy part of this goal setting is the reverse engineering and figuring out all the steps we need to take to make our goal a reality – but again, most people don’t know what they want – they don’t know what to put in the top section of their triangle.

And I’m not talking the vague goals – like hitting a beach in retirement.

I’m talking about that picture goal where they could describe the taste, sights, smells, feels of their goal.

Okay, so we get that most people don’t actually know what they want and don’t really have goals.

By the way, I fall into this category often.

It’s realizing once you’ve climbed one mountain you are now at the foot of another mountain and then you need to decide which mountain you are going to climb now.

Sometimes you are just tired of climbing.

Tired of reaching goals.

There’s nothing sexy about goal setting.

GOAL SETTING IS THE HARDEST WORK YOU WILL DO – EVER!

Figuring out how you want to design your life – YOUR LIFE (not the life your parents wanted you to have) is hard work.

It’s definitely something that takes longer than 5-minutes.

Sometimes, for excitement, you keep on the goal hamster wheel, never quite accomplishing the ‘real’ goals because what is on the other side of that goal is change and fear and better to stay in the comfort zone of predictability.

And then when your life goes from not having anything figured out to having your goals totally laid out, figured out and you’ve boarded the train – no turning back – then what?

I had K (not her real name obvi) crying in my grade 8 class.

8:35am.

Friday morning.

Bawling.

I asked her what was wrong and she began to tell me how people will make fun of her if she goes after her goal.

Now, keep in mind that we just started the goal exercise which is supposed to take 5-minutes out of a 4-hour teaching program that I was facilitating.

I haven’t had enough coffee at this point yet….

So, I approached her and saw she had indeed filled out the top of the pyramid (you know, the one goal that most of us haven’t even figured out yet!)

She wanted to be a cartoonist.

My heart crumbled listening to a 14-year-old share with me her passion for wanting to create a cartoon and how she decided not to go after her dream because she cared too much about what other people would think of her, from her family to her peers and friends and how they might make fun of her and think her idea for a cartoon was dumb.

I was at a loss for words.

These are conversations I have daily with my entrepreneur circle of friends at age 40, not a conversation I would expect to have with a 14-year-old.

My heart wasn’t at a loss for words.

My heart just wanted to pour into her 39-years of encouragement.

I rubbed her back and just listened to her cry and share with me all the reasons she couldn’t become a cartoonist.

I tried my best, but what I really want to say to her I can’t say in a 20-second span of time.

So, I encouraged her as best I could to go for it and said a silent prayer for her under my breath – something along the lines of, “Dear God, Bless this dear girl’s dreams. Give her strength and throw me some too while you’re at it!”

Don’t worry, I didn’t tell her that life sucked and that she WOULD in fact be rejected by the world MANY times if she really did go after it!

It’s the horrible secret that successful people never want to tell you about.

Then I wrote this to her.

Maybe it’s not for her, maybe it’s for me today.

Maybe it’s for you.

Maybe one day she’ll read this or maybe my daughters will.

Dear K,

You have had a big dream placed inside of you.

It’s there on purpose. It’s what you are meant to do in this world, in this life.

You have to listen to that dream.

I want to warn you that it won’t be easy.

In fact… it down right sucks like 99% of the time.

You will have sleepless nights on your journey.

You will suffer bouts of depression and anger.

You will swear and curse and yell in frustration.

It’s not happy, it’s not glorious, it’s hard unrewarding work for most of the time.

You can’t give up because your only job is to share your gifts.

Your job is to make your art, create what you are here to create and share it with the world – even when it feels the whole world is laughing, even when it feels the whole world is against you.

When this happens, focus on ‘the one’.

The one person whose life you are going to change, transform and make better because you followed your soul, your dream, your passion.

That one person needs you.

(Even if that one person might be you.)

They need to hear you, see you – they are seeking the encouragement you will give them by living your dream out loud for the world to see.

And yes, there will be haters.

The more you share your gifts, the more people will disagree with it, mock you BUT the glorious side of that is that the more you share your gifts the more you will find your people, your community – more love.

Don’t live your life for someone else. It’s the biggest regret most people have.

Don’t live your life with out letting your dream out into the world – otherwise it festers like a cancer in your body when you do that.

You are rare and special and have a dream that makes you uniquely you.

Your only job is to follow that seed and see where it grows to.

It’s not your dream’s job to make you happy.

It’s not your dream’s job to make you rich.

It’s not the world’s job to cheer you on.

Those things will be by-products at some point.

For right now, it’s your job to tune out the nay-sayers who tell you to quit and get a “real” job, or stop pursuing your silly dreams (side note: WTH is that? A ‘real’ job?! People still say that to me!)

Your job is to stay focused on your art, that big goal ahead of you.

That’s it.

The rest can fall away.

There is no better feeling than feeling proud of the work you do and doing the work you were called to do.

You were called to this.

This is your LEGACY.

Live it.

Love,

xx Lisa

Blog.

Saying “No”

Saying No

Here’s some shocking truth:

When you say “No” you are saying “YES” to yourself.

I only say shocking because most of us still haven’t figured this one out, yet we’ve heard it a million times.

Lately, I’ve been learning to say “No” to a few things.

I still have a LONG way to go and I’ll tell you it doesn’t FEEL good right now.

It’s not a skill I’ve ever wanted to use.

I’ve always been your “Yes” girl.

I love people, love social events, love business events – and yet, I’m forcing myself to exercise the “No” muscle.

Sure, it’s easy when there is a scheduling conflict – and then you choose the higher priority option, but when you have to choose and event over yourself…

This, for many of us people pleasers, is incredibly hard.

But here is the crazy thing.

Growing the “No” muscle, like all skills & habits, will become easier with time.

My biggest fear is that I’ll get so good at saying “No” that I will end up be ostracized from society and no longer have any friends. #truestory

“The difference between successful people and really successful people is that really successful people say ‘no’ to almost everything.”

Warren Buffet

I might classify myself as a successful person on most days.

The problem is —- that I would really like to fall into the “Really Successful” category one day, and that is probably going to be a stretch for someone who says “Yes” to so many things.

You can even “over volunteer”.

Not that any of it is really bad.

Volunteering isn’t bad.

Social and Family events aren’t bad.

Business Conferences and Networking events aren’t bad.

In fact, it’s all FUN!

But I will tell you why it’s bad for you.

It’s bad for you if your soul has been requested for another project.

or said in another way…

You’re not doing your purpose work.

You are procrastinating by over-volunteering, over-connecting, over-networking, even over-working in a job that’s not for you or just over-doing all the things you know you are not called to do.

And it’s hard.

It’s sucks your entire schedule up, gnaws away at all your time and leaves you EMPTY.

Doing things that you are not called to do, that don’t align with your soul WILL in fact leave you empty.

And guess what… I see the empty, stressed out souls.

I can probably only identify them because I’m one of them.

Well, I’m aware and working on it…

TIME being the biggest thing we must protect as a non-renewable resource, and not as important is money – only because it is a renewable resource.

(Yes, there’s more money ALWAYS available to you.)

However, this whole funny “saying “No” to others is actually saying “Yes” to yourself” thing also applies to your wealth and money.

The more you say “No” to buying crap you don’t need, the more you are saying “Yes” to your future self.

Hmmmmm……

Food for thought anyways.

I can say “No” to buying almost anything for myself.

It’s like a skill that comes after years and years of practice.

However, when it comes to my kids, I’m horrible.

And, I know so many parents are in the same boat.

We literally give our kids anything – you know what I mean.

This whole saying “No” thing is very difficult.

I would say men in general have an easier time with saying “No” than women. It’s like we have this natural “say YES to everything” gene programmed in us – just from what I have observed my whole life.

And what makes it really easy to say “No” is when you have clear and defined plans, goals, outcomes you are seeking.

When you do know what goal you seek, saying “No” becomes a whole lot easier because you are saying “Yes” to your goals and making yourself a priority.

Staying in alignment with your soul and your soul’s calling will be rewarding, even if at first it’s hard.

Maybe it’s time you get on the “No” train as Marie Forleo says.

Maybe it’s time you start to choose yourself over all the other stuff.

I would also say to you that I’ve heard this story for over 20 years, but just now starting to REALLY REALLY internalize it and what it means to my life to say “No” to the things pulling me away from my goals (and the people!)

Not easy.

The only other thing I really want to say on this topic is that the people who don’t have clearly defined goals and plans will always be swayed by the people who do.

In other words (and I’ve said it so much, I’m sure it will be printed on my headstone) – THE PERSON WITH THE MOST CLARITY WINS!

So for all my peeps who are committed to a goal, to their financial goals, their body goals, their family goals, to their business and to something BIG they are doing in the world – learn to say “No” and you will….

Live Your Legacy.

xx Lisa

Blog.

Selling Yourself On Yourself

Selling Yourself on Yourself

This is it.

What I’ve learned about all of life can be boiled down to this:

You have to KEEP selling yourself on yourself every day.

You have to KEEP selling yourself your dreams.

You have to HAVE your own back, day-in and day-out.

You have to TALK yourself up and TALK yourself off the ledge.

You have to KEEP going even when it sucks, even when it feels like this whole “life” thing isn’t working out the way you planned.

You have to RECOGNIZE that there are REALLY, TRULY going to be more shitty days than good ones ESPECIALLY if you are on your way to achieving BIG goals you set for yourself, AND THEN still be okay when you know it’s all an uphill battle all the time.

Knowing the next battle is 5-minutes from now.

You have to KEEP re-iterating to yourself, over and over like a broken record, the plans, the goals, the dreams.

Daily.

Hourly.

Sometimes minute by minute.

You have to FIND a way to bring to life the desires of your HEART everyday.

This is MINDSET. This is SOULSET. This is HEARTSET.

(This is when you need to read Robin Sharma’s newest book, 5AM CLUB!)

These are the keys to REALIZE that dream that for most of us will take years, if not decades to achieve.

Sure you don’t need to do any of this, and just coast through your average comfy-comfort zone life. (Then this blog isn’t for you. This is for the ones who know they are called to the BIG MISSION, the BIG DREAMS, THE IMPOSSIBLE.)

What are you building right now? Is it really worthy of your truest, highest self?

Ya… that’s a #micdrop if I ever heard one. #boom

Are you doing the work you were called to do?

It’s not glamorous.

It’s not even thrilling.

In fact, most of the time it’s emails, scheduling events and appointments and the crap work. It’s mind numbing.

The daily grind is the only place in the world where what feels like a billion little losses over time end up in EPIC WINS when you have your goal before you.

You have to BE PERSISTENT.

You can’t quit.

There’s only one way to become great.

The only way to do great things is to believe in your own bull-shit so passionately, that eventually it comes true.

Take the steps necessary when:

  • no one is watching
  • no one is looking
  • no one cares
  • no one will save you
  • no one is cheering you on
  • when the whole world is against you

Today is 200.

200 Weeks.

200 Blogs.

200,000+ Words.

Religiously.

Taking action on my dreams when:

  • No one is reading
  • No one is liking or hearting my posts
  • I sure don’t feel like it
  • I feel it’s not working
  • I feel it’s the biggest waste of time ever
  • I just want to cry (and cry I do…)

That is what I’m celebrating today.

200 weeks of doing the work.

Sometime C- work, sometimes A+ work.

Doesn’t matter.

I showed up.

I showed up for myself.

I did the work.

That’s all.

Keep doing the work when no one is watching.

That’s how you become great.

You have to learn that it’s nobody else’s job on the planet to make you happy.

You learn quickly it’s no one else’s job on the planet to save you.

No one is going to bail you out.

(And trust me, I so desperately want to be saved! I’m a Disney Princess at heart….)

It’s nobody else’s job on the planet to help you.

You have to help yourself.

You have to SELL yourself on that BIG ASS DREAM every bloody day. (And yes, they are messy days, maybe not blood, but sweat and tears for sure!)

And yes, it’s exhausting.

And yes, it’s not fun.

And yes, it down right sucks the life out of you.

(If your dream isn’t sucking the life out of you on some level, then maybe it’s not big enough, maybe you need to learn how to dream BIG….)

And yes, it can and will at times cause depression or illness and take you for everything you have.

But that’s only because it’s building you. It’s testing you.

Your vision, your dream, your goals.

They are testing to see if you are up for the job.

If you can handle the pressure.

The thing is this.

Compliments are nice.

We all want to hear them.

BUT THE GREAT will not fall for the compliments, as they will not fall for the negative words or criticisms – good, bad or ugly – it’s all just noise.

THE GREAT only listen to that still small voice inside them.

It will NEVER EVER let you down.

They are masters of blocking the rest of the noise out.

They continue on.

They know that it’s their job and only their job to see their vision through to the end.

That the whole way they view the world is up to them.

So, they become masters at selling themselves on themselves every moment.

They become masters of winking at themselves in the mirror and loving themselves and slapping their own ass.

They know that the world is a better place with them in it AND sharing their gifts IN FULL.

They are relentless.

They will not stop because you don’t like them.

They will not stop because of your opinions.

They will SUCCEED because they don’t quit.

And THEY WILL LIVE THEIR LEGACY.

xx Lisa

PS. CHEERS to my fans and readers who have literally been with me for these past 200 weeks as I endeavor to radically transform money mindset & financial education in our world. I’m so grateful that you read these words and I pray I add some encouragement and ASSet Kicking to your day, but above all, I truly hope you are out there living your legacy. Shine bright. xx

PPS. Sign up for my FREE 30-day shift into TRUEABUNDANCE.ca!

Blog.

The Power of “AND”

The Power of And by Lisa Elle

I have been in a state of inquiry.

This happens often for me.

I hope it happens to you too, cause it’s a growth thing.

Sometimes I get my answers immediately and move on with life.

Other times, I get stuck and stay in inquiry for weeks, maybe months.

My life seems to stop.

It comes in the form of depression, or at least that’s how it presents itself.

(I am cringing writing this, I really hate being this vulnerable with random strangers… and even more so with the people I love or people that know me!)

Not having clarity around a certain issue in your life always manifests itself in a form of depression. I’m aware of this for myself, and I can usually spot it in others. (If not, this being the main root of depression in most humans.)

This inquiry I’m in right now I want to share with you because I think it has a profound impact on ALL aspects of our lives, including money.

Warning: BLOG POST 1723 LIFE GIVING WORDS! #micdrop

So, way back in the day, the biggest challenge (of my teen years and twenties) most definitely was self-worth or my lack of it.

This is what fueled my life.

Not being good enough.

Never being good enough.

The entire list of accomplishments in my life can all be traced back to self-worth issues and having to prove everything to everyone.

I would say I valued myself below all people, from a place of love and respect. Meaning, I have always had the gift of being able to see the gifts and beauty of everyone around me, look at them with awe, but not myself.

I do have the gift of deep compassion.

I’ll be honest, I struggle with how that serves me. The best that I can come up with is that it is the fuel for my why and overflowing compassion which powers my relentless drive to serve others in the area of money mindset, above all the other money stuff.

Then in my early 30’s, I went through my awkward, but the BEST ever, spiritual phase. The one where you really seek out, test all your beliefs and come to a deep understanding about life and death and everything in between. You really come to know the character of God/universe/higher self. (PS. some people find this in their 20’s, others in their 50’s or 60’s – it’s not a competition, this is just when I really came to peace with death, for lack of a better description.)

The place where death has lost its sting, the place where I don’t fear death for myself or anyone, and the place where I literally have the peace that passes understanding – because you literally can’t understand it – it doesn’t make logical sense – AT ALL.

You just are connected to God. That’s what I call it – you can call it whatever you want.

That was my spiritual phase.

Where everything under the sun is meaningless (so to speak). Zen. Peace.

So, in this last decade – and keep in mind, I’m turning 40 at the end of this year – I have literally swung the pendulum from a place of “not good enough” to a place of “you are perfect just as you are” and it did leave me confused.

Dichotomy.

Duality.

Cognitive Dissonance.

Opposite beliefs at best.

And can you see where having opposing beliefs in life can totally mess you up?

It’s like you are not allowed to like black and white, you have to choose one. (That’s what society has pushed for so long, still does. “Are you Republican or Democrat? You can’t be both.)

And I have said this many times, probably in 199 different ways (because you are reading blog 199!)….

Life is duality.

Life is meant to be opposing.

In all things.

The thing that we as humans forget and to be honest, we humans totally don’t like to sit on the fence where both sides exist.

We crave black and white.

We crave right and wrong.

Make a choice already. Stop procrastinating.

And do you know how difficult it is to live in a mind where you see both sides as equal and both beautiful and necessary to this life?

Can you live in a place where you hold 2 contradicting beliefs at the same time?

“You are worthy just as you are in this moment.”

and

“You can grow and strive for the next level.”

Wouldn’t that blow your mind?

I personally have been having a very hard time with it over the last few years trying to understand something that doesn’t really make logical sense.

On one hand, if you truly live in a place where you know that there is nothing you can do to “be worthy” – you just are – and that you were created perfectly and everything is perfect and let’s say you are totally sold on that and totally ZEN about it – then from a place of peace, contentment and love – what is the point of swinging back to the place of strive, hustle, become great, set the goals, do the things to get to the next level?

In other words, what is really the point of living? Why strive and fight for your goals? Why make the world a better place when the world truly is perfect as it is?

(Okay, I completely realize that this is going to sound crazy to some, but I know my peeps are nodding their heads and totally relating to this right now!)

Do you get what I’m putting down?

Why hustle when you are already created perfect?

Why strive when none of it really matters at the end of the day?

Okay, so, many people haven’t even discovered the place where they are worthy and created perfect and there is nothing they can do to lose favour in this perfect universe.

That’s really a hard thing to understand and resonate with, especially if you’ve been programmed not to believe that.

And yes, when you get to that point, you can join a monastery and meditate all day, because you are totally enlightened. (Vipassana anyone?)

You are SET FREE when you realize that you are totally worthy.

And then real life kicks in, your ego kicks in and wants more for you – wants more from you. (This is good btw, and by design.)

But wait – you are already made prefect – and worthy.

So, how does this all fit in with everything – money? life?

EVERYTHING!

When you are completely stuck in the “I’m not worthy” and “always striving” camp, you will completely block the flow of money to you.

But when you are stuck in the “I’m worthy” camp and sit on your butt all day doing nothing just because you know you are worthy, that’s not good either. You will create a different kind of money block.

See how confusing this is?!

FYI – those of you with a hard work ethic, top of the class, volunteer to death, many degrees and certificates – especially in women – is usually (not always) a sign of “I’m not worthy.”

Isn’t that fascinating?!

It’s usually the women that bust their butts, and seem to have all this success from the outside world that struggle with self-worth the most.

Not to mention, people who are very intuitive and connected struggle even worse than the average bear.

If you resonate with this at all, you are my people!

But if there’s hope for me, there’s hope for all of us women/people that struggle in this area.

I learned a secret tool back in 2013.

It’s so simple and yet so magical.

It’s the word AND.

AND.

Yup, the word AND.

It’s being able to hold space for two opposing beliefs – or morph/combine the 2 beliefs and create your own new belief, totally in alignment with all your crazy opposing beliefs.

To utilize the word “AND”, you need to:

  1. Believe that your beliefs are the most powerful magical tool you have and can and will totally transform your life.
  2. That you can create any new belief at any point in your life – they are always morphing and changing, not just a one-and-done thing.
  3. Believe that words your say become your thoughts and your thoughts become your feelings and eventually deeply register as your actions – which become your beliefs.

If you believe those statements, then you can start adding the word “AND” into your life and start shifting some of your beliefs that are holding you back.

Example:

Perhaps you love yourself very much, yet on the same hand you want to “look” better in whatever area, yet you logically realize you can’t be unhappy with your body on one hand and love it on the other – it truly doesn’t make sense.

“Pick one already!” Your brain screams to you. Either hate or love yourself.

But the truth is this, we do love ourselves and we want to improve as well.

Here’s how you do that.

Combine your belief that you are worthy with a belief of something you would like to believe or accomplish, even if it doesn’t exist in your current reality.

“I am worthy AND I am worthy of (getting a boob lift, losing weight, start eating right, lift weights, rockin’ body, etc.)”

Here are some more examples of “AND”:

I am worthy as I am now AND I am worthy of:

  • being fit, lean & healthy
  • earning $XXX,XXX,XXX per month/year in my business
  • making $XXX,XXX,XXX per month/year at my job
  • saving/investing $XXX,XXX,XXX per month/year
  • being healed
  • on my way to becoming …….
  • being a great mom, sister, friend, daughter, wife, partner …….

I encourage you to write down a few of these statements in your journal and say them out loud AND let the words resonate through your body after you declare them.

There is power in words.

You don’t have to choose one side or the other anymore. You can love yourself in your current reality and get to the next level.

See, it still doesn’t make logical sense, but you’ll have to go on a leap of faith here and really start re-programming your neural-pathways.

If you’ve been struggling with being “good enough” and “not being good enough” at the same time, then this is how you conquer it. (The head-knowledge versus the heart-knowledge, right? They say different things.)

If you’ve been struggling with just the good ‘ol “not being good enough”, then just drill in the “I am worthy.”

The few people in the world that I have met that have this down to science are usually the most successful people I know, in all areas of their life.

Embrace the opposite.

Guess what!

There is room for us all and all our opposite beliefs to live in harmony.

You can love yourself, be enlightened and hustle and strive for the next level.

The world is a walking, breathing contradiction anyways. Many of us just haven’t accepted that it’s okay to just BE that way.

(BTW, this magic word can heal all kinds of relationships, not just your money beliefs.)

Make peace in your head, clear the chaos by adding AND to your life.

I am wonderfully made AND so are you.

Best of all, what becomes possible for you through the word “AND”?

Tell me!

This is how you….

Live Your Legacy!

xx Lisa

PS. Okay, that was a long one, but so important to get this mindset thing right! Same with your money!

If you need to create clarity around your money, make sure to check out The Wealth Spa™ Money Method!

Blog.

5 Ways To Master Your Networking

5 Ways To Master Your Networking

I’m heading to Calgary today to talk to a group of women on networking.

I decided to take a different approach than giving the standard spiel on, “make sure to be a card collector vs. a card giver”, “have your elevator pitch ready” and “know your follow up sequence” blah, blah.

You’ve heard it a million times.

You know how to network.

But I want to sing a different song to my group of 40 or so professional women today at lunch.

I thought this would be beneficial to you (my loyal blog readers) as well, because most of my tribe have something going on in the realm of business, and by golly – there has got to be a better way to network that to show up to a million meetings with substandard hotel coffee and stale doughnuts.

PLUS – THIS IS ALL ABOUT MAKING MONEY BABY!

Here is my take on networking.

Once upon a time, an alpha-male (I’d use another name, but I’ll be polite) who was a “sales-guru” hired by my brokerage, stood in front of a room of “sales-people” and made us memorize that “our network = our net worth”.

He went on to say that if you want to kill it in sales, then you “MUST HAVE” a pretty big network.

Okay, so that wasn’t the first time I’ve ever heard that, but I took it to heart.

UNTIL, I realized I had a vagina and that I’ve NEVER been successful TRYING my whole career to do things the way a MAN does. Seriously.

(Not to bash men, I adore and look up to most of them, but somehow the alpha-males just get into my head and marinate there!)

But, before heading down the rabbit hole and telling you how I FAILED miserably in business until I started following my own way of doing things (like relating financial concepts to shoes as I do in my book, Strut), there was a greater truth that was revealed to me.

A few years later, last summer to be exact, there was this MASSIVE A-HA moment when I looked at a few VERY successful people around me and they actually had, like, NO NETWORK or basically just knew a few people in the business world. They kept to themselves, and you’d barely know they existed.

To take it a step further, they actually massively disliked humans – you know, for the most part – they never wanted to be around people AND YET, (here’s the KICKER IN THE FACE!) – they were worth millions and making a ton of money, if not millions a year.

This naturally confused me.

I mean, if I followed the belief that my network = my networth, then I would be one of the richest people in the world. I adore people, LOVE the humans, and because of it, I do have a huge network.

This belief of mine would also make most women the richest in the world, as we are queens of the socializing, but we all know this isn’t the case.

The “sales-guru” guy hired by my brokerage to tell me that the size of my network = my net worth was TOTALLY WRONG.

The 2 aren’t at all correlated.

That day my life changed.

DA-DA-DA………

I changed my belief from “my network = my net worth” TO “I could make money literally sitting at home all day”. (Not that I do, but you get my point.)

I just needed to find one or 2 amazing people to work with, or people whose zone of genius was “connecting” or hit up my exact ideal clients one on one and go for a coffee, once a week – not 500 times a week. (I have every coffee rewards card in the City of Calgary!)

I stopped chasing NETWORKING events. I stopped even looking for speaking gigs or anything.

Yes, I still LOVE speaking, and will do it because I love it, but I’m no longer doing it for the reason to network, I’m doing it to hone my skill as a speaker, so my message can reach more people.

Oh, and I LOVE HUMANS so much. So, that’s not changing.

Here’s the beautiful thing I’ve preached on this blog a hundred times: fall IN LOVE with changing, challenging and creating new beliefs.

Every time you change your beliefs, expand them or get rid of old ones, you up-level your life.

So, that is:

Networking Tip #1: Your Network DOESN’T Equal Your NET WORTH!

Networking Tip #2: The Person With The Most Clarity Wins

Every time.

Do you really know what you want?

(Cause if you don’t know you will be sucked into someone else’s “WHY” and “WANTS”!)

Why did you just show up at this networking event?

Did you walk in with a goal? Was it to build fabulous connections with 2 new people?

Hey, this goes for sales too.

Oh, and anything you want in life, including sex.

You have to know what you want.

The person with the most clarity wins because clarity breeds confidence and courage.

Let’s be honest.

Most people really don’t know what they want in the grand scheme of things.

So…..

Be clear.

Be direct.

Get in, get out.

Which leads naturally into…

Networking Tip #3: Time Is Your Most Valuable Resource

Before you sign up for your next “networking” meeting, make sure you really calculate the cost of it.

Time, usually being the biggest cost, is often wasted when you are a “people pleaser” like me. Naturally wanting to please everyone, I say YES way more than I should.

You need to get on the “NO” train, as Marie Forleo says, and oh, here’s something Warren Buffett said, “The difference between successful people and really successful people is that really successful people say no to almost everything.”

#boom

#micdrop

Networking Tip #4: Don’t Be Fake

Everyone can tell if you have a canned Elevator Speech.

I’m FULLY against them.

I don’t even have one.

Guess, what.

My belief here, (and you don’t have to believe what I say) is that LAW OF ATTRACTION will win EVERY TIME, meaning, if you say “UM” or screw up your elevator pitch by stumbling over a few words, trust me – it won’t matter.

Your vibe, genuine or not, salesy or not, heart-felt or not, will SHINE through.

People can see into your S-O-U-L!

So, don’t sweat the fact that you don’t know what to say or that your 30-second pitch isn’t great.

I change mine all the time. You’re probably like me.

Mutli-passionate and where to begin?! Do I start by saying I’m a writer, blogger, author? Or do I lead with my 20-years experience as a CFP, have created over 5 online courses or do I lead with the fact I’m a mom, or do I say I’m going to take over the world?!

Seriously.

Difficult to fit all that into a 30-second pitch.

Networking Tip #5: Be Smart

This goes back to the ‘time’ thing, but you need to pick and choose where you are going to get your best bang for your buck!

Maybe hotel networking events aren’t for you, maybe you are better off choosing specific volunteering gigs where you can better meet the people you need to connect to.

Or maybe you host your own lunch n’ learns or host wine n’ cheese events for prospective clients.

The thing is this.

Pick and choose wisely the events that will naturally feed your business.

Say “no” to the rest.

Maybe you prefer 1:1 coffee dates?

I do. I love getting to know people on a deep level.

That stuff FILLS ME UP!

If you do a ton of networking events, you obviously know you need to cultivate relationships. That’s what this whole thing is anyways.

That’s all marketing is.

Period.

Sharing your message with people.

So, do you have a plan for that?

Do you have a plan for cultivating relationships in a way that doesn’t feel yucky or salesy to you?

Do you have a plan for cultivating relationships that doesn’t leave you feeling drained by the end of the day?

Do you have a plan to take over the world (aka. take your business to the next level?!)

Make one!

Live Your Legacy!

xx Lisa

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It’s like yoga for your money.

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Blog.

Believe The Lie

Believe the Lie

It’s all a lie.

All the things I’m telling myself.

It’s a lie that I weigh 150 lbs.

It’s a lie that I have a multi-million dollar corporation.

It’s a lie that I can run a marathon.

It’s all just lies.

HOWEVER.

You have to believe many of the lies you tell yourself.

Yes, your current reality does not reflect where you are headed or where you are going to be.

BUT you can’t let the lies of the future things you want, which you don’t have right now, stop you.

You have to fake it till you make it.

You have to believe the lies, the fakeness, the dream, the goal, the plans SO HARD that you convince your sub-conscience mind that they are REAL.

This is BELIEF AHEAD OF TIME.

You have to believe before time reality.

You have to turn your truth into reality.

Nothing great has ever been accomplished without the belief that the goal, the dream, the vision will one day be a present reality.

So, ya, you have to start believing your lies.

You have to believe your fake news.

Everyone makes fun of the fake news, but I know it’s power.

Belief is the most powerful force in the world.

(You don’t have to look far to see how true that statement is!)

If you believe it, to your core, it will be your truth.

It will prevail in reality.

GOOD, BAD, or UGLY.

Yes, what I am saying is, obviously, this belief works for the good guys and strongly as it does for the bad guys.

Do you get why the “bad guys” or the liars and the cheaters win sometimes in the world?

Their belief is stronger than yours.

Take that one to the bank.

Make your belief the strongest.

You have amazing things you want to create in this world.

It’s time you create them!

It’s time you BELIEVE YOUR BULLSHIT!

‘Cause your bullshit is good.

I believed mine.

I would never have published a book or 2, if I didn’t believe what I was saying was going to somehow help thousands of people.

So, you know what you have to do.

Don’t let anyone look at you where you are today and snicker at you.

Find the people that see and believe where you are going.

But, even then, forget about ALL OF THEM, ALL OF THE PEOPLE.

YOU.

You need to be the ONLY ONE who believes in your dreams.

You need to be the ONLY ONE that believe you will weigh your dream weight, or bench your dream bench press, or write your dream book, or sing your dream song, or work your dream job, or love your dream person, or make your dream income.

Just you.

Do you believe it?

Are you believing your present reality how it looks to the outside world?

or

Are you going to believe in yourself and believe the unseen?

Live Your Legacy.

xx Lisa

Blog.

Stop Discounting Yourself

Stop Discounting Yourself

Yesterday a colleague, who happens to also be an economics university professor, was asking me about my view on my industry.

During our conversation, we got on to the topic about how women entrepreneurs completely discount their worth.

He was telling me how my prices were way to low for what I offer.

I know that.

I’m aware that I discount myself.

Sometimes it’s not bad, but sometimes it is.

Women in general do this way too often.

You are discounting yourself too often.

What are the signs you are?

Well, by-golly-gee my loves, the first one that pops into my mind is cash flow.

Yup, not just me but MANY MANY women are not asking for more.

I don’t think (for the most part) it has anything to do with wage inequality.

I think it all has to do with the fact that we still don’t ask for the money and that we don’t think we are worthy of large sums of money.

2 Golden Rules:

  1. Ask and ye shall receive. (Oh, even the Bible tells you to do this…)
  2. Knowing, Believing and Radiating You ARE Worthy of it ALL – HEALTH, WEALTH & LOVE!

I think you get to wake up every morning in this world, this specific life, on this specific planet and you get to choose your thoughts.

It’s really mind blowing – the whole world really does revolve around you -in a way…. your thoughts are really that powerful.

I don’t think anyone is going to try to fight me on that point, except perhaps the people who still think life “happens” to them and they are merely spectators in the game of life.

Okay, so if we were to analyze what my problems really are, well, it would all fall back into my thinking.

Yours would too.

We are still holding on to such crazy beliefs that are norms of society.

You don’t have to believe what everyone else is believing.

Can you guess why you are discounting yourself in the area of who you deserve to be in a relationship with, how much money you make, or why you don’t deserve to be 100% healthy, healed, lean & fit?

It’s because you have MESSY THINKING.

Your thoughts are still clogging up the channel that is stopping you from being able to receive all that you are here to receive and ALL THAT YOU DESERVE TO RECEIVE!

CLEAN UP YOUR DAMN THINKING GIRL!

It’s muddy, it’s muck and it’s down right not serving your life.

You are the one creating a faulty connection between you and your higher power. (You can’t blame Telus, Bell or Rogers – but you can try…)

Here are a few thoughts you may want to kick to the curb:

  • I can’t lose weight
  • I can’t make money
  • Making money is hard
  • Business is hard
  • Sales is hard
  • Men suck
  • Exercise is hard
  • Netflix is my life
  • Budgeting is hard
  • I’m bad with numbers
  • My boss is a b*tch
  • My job sucks
  • I don’t get paid enough
  • My friends aren’t there for me
  • No one supports me

Can you only imagine what this persons life looks like?

Okay, so we all still have at least one of those thoughts I just listed.

Don’t lie to yourself!

Take that thought and turn it around.

Turn around the ones you struggle with and make them your new mantra.

Repeat.

The only way you are not going to discount yourself as you go through this life is if you start cleaning up your thinking and choose the thoughts on purpose.

This plays into every area of your life.

If you want true abundance, stop discounting.

You want ALL THE THINGS, stop discounting.

You want to get serious and make some serious money, stop discounting.

I want to pose a very deep thought for you and me.

I’m the queen of discount shopping – thrift stores, etc.

Here’s something to ponder:

Does discount shopping reflect your self-worth?

I mean, maybe, just maybe, the reason I’m so hooked on good deals is because I never believed I was worth the full-price Chanel.

Hmmm, it may be time to uplevel your life and start by buying or doing something you didn’t feel you deserved in the past.

I’m not saying be stupid with your money, but really be clear with your thinking on how shopping discount is perhaps from a belief of lack or scarcity. It doesn’t mean it is AT ALL (you could just like the chase of the deal like I do), just be aware of the thoughts that are tricking you into playing a small game.

I’ll leave you with that my friends.

Don’t forget…

Live Your Legacy!

xx Lisa

Blog.

STOP!

STOP

There are 4 things you really need to STOP if you really want to live your best life:

1.Stop trying to live a balanced life.

There is no such thing as a balanced life and what’s the point of that? Are you trying to arrive safely at death?

If you believe you are here for a really GREAT purpose, then stop trying to live a balanced life – that will be the nemesis of your vision and goal.

To accomplish great things will require your life to be FULL and 100% out of balance.

It may be 60/40 or 95/5, either way, seeking balance is a fool-proof way of failing if you are really trying to accomplish anything great.

Reminder that good is the opposite of great.

And I’m talking about being GREAT!

2. Stop thinking there is no room for your dream or that it’s already been done before.

Because guess what – it’s ALL been done before – BUT not by Y-O-U.

You have that special ingredient that no one has – but you have to believe it.

A fabulous quote by Mark Twain – if you don’t believe me then believe him:

“There is no such thing as a new idea. It is impossible. We simply take a lot of old ideas and put them into a sort of mental kaleidoscope. We give them a turn and they make new and curious combinations. We keep on turning and making new combinations indefinitely; but they are the same old pieces of colored glass that have been in use through all the ages.”

3. Stop – PLEASE stop – listening to other people.

I don’t mean stop listening to other people but I do mean stop internalizing every damn thing that everyone tells you about you or how you should or shouldn’t live your life.

Choose one or two mentors – not 7 billion. You have to stop listening to the rest of the crowd.

You have to really get good at the skill of tuning people’s opinions out.

Opinions run rampant and most people let them stop them from following their dreams.

Most people disguise these comments to you as being helpful to you, or they are trying to be “realistic” with you or they are just trying to make sure you don’t get hurt or fail.

Either way…

Who cares?

Fail anyways.

Be TOTALLY UNREALISTIC!

Anyone that does NOT support your dreams is probably not a person you should listen to seriously anyways. (Yup, tough love….)

and finally….

4. Stop that negative self-talk.

Just stop.

Pinch yourself.

Do whatever it takes to stop saying you can’t.

Do whatever it takes to start saying YES to yourself.

So, next question:

How does this affect your money?

  1. Go 110% after your money goals.
  2. Figure out what the real cost of not going for your BIG money dreams is?
  3. A million people pulling your brain in a million different directions only leads to procrastination with your finances, and not to mention lack of confidence with the money past decisions you made.
  4. Talk positively about all your financial dealings, ’cause your words create your life.

Don’t forget to….

Live Your Legacy!

xx Lisa

PS. If you aren’t subscribed to getting my weekly blog, make sure to sign up at financialbliss.ca and get a ton of other goodies with your FREE subscription!

Blog.

Sucking @ Grace

Sucking At Grace

Okay, this is where you may need a kick in the pants.

In your grace dispensing.

To Yourself.

I’m not going to sugar coat it because I see this all the time.

YOU ARE STILL APOLOGIZING FOR YOUR LIFE.

People come to me all the time apologizing they aren’t where they want to be.

You still aren’t at your ideal job, education level, income….

You still have debt, not enough saved up, got set back due to illness, care-giving….

The LIST, my friends, is endless.

There’s a million excuses.

And, guess what – NOBODY CARES BUT YOU.

You are the only who cares about the excuses you have as to why you aren’t where you want to be right now.

Somewhere in your head you are still making this mean something about you.

You are still making this mean that you are not good enough.

You still haven’t accepted and embraced that, well, first of all, life is naturally at minimum 50% of crappy un-ideal STUFF to work through and that secondly, that’s how you grow.

You don’t grow without challenges.

You are still apologizing.

You are still apologizing for being you.

You are still apologizing for not being in the NOT YET camp.

Where’s the grace?

Where’s the grace you need to be shown by you for you?

Are you finally starting to adopt the “I don’t care what my neighbor is doing, I will focus on my own journey” attitude?

The second you start apologizing for being where you are right now – in this season of life – is the moment you have compared yourself to something.

Many times it’s the ambiguous “SOCIETY” in general.

I’ve had clients many MANY times ask me how they are “doing” for their age financially. People always want a benchmark to compare themselves to.

It’s like if you are above the average that makes you better.

It doesn’t.

It really doesn’t matter what you earn or what debt you have or ANY OF IT.

Because too many people are still tying that to their self-worth and letting it get into their head and it’s blocking them from doing the REAL WORK – their purpose work, passion work, the SOUL-EXPLODING-WORK that they were called to do.

And that’s because all they are focused on is getting above average results.

When you are focused on getting above average results, you will never get GREAT MIND-BLOWING RESULTS.

This goes for anything in your life.

Financial.

Relationships.

LOVE.

All of it my LOVES, all of it!

And all because you are apologizing for the season of life you are in.

Don’t apologize for being in a season of life that maybe is pulling you further away from your goals.

It’s OKAY.

Own the season.

Own the fact you are raising kids and the braces cost a fortune.

Own the fact that you not where you want to be financially because you took a year off and traveled the world.

Own your past choices.

The reason for your debt – love it.

Learn from it.

Call it your greatest lesson.

The reason you had to go bankrupt, quit your job, got let go, aren’t making as much as you want right now – it’s all there for you to overcome, for you to grow, and…

for you to learn how to heap loads of GRACE on yourself.

Have you ever thought the lesson here for you right now is just a lesson in learning how to love yourself?

Learning how to give your soul, spirit, body, mind and heart some GRACE?

What if that’s just the lesson?

What if it’s not more complicated than that?

Here’s my big reveal for you, it’s usually and A-HA for most people.

You will never be able to HATE yourself rich.

You will never be able to HATE yourself to losing weight or your best body.

You will never be able to HATE yourself to any GOAL you desire.

You have to love yourself if you want the goal to stick.

You have to be your own best cheerleader.

You have to let yourself be the biggest loser and still be able to laugh at yourself and fail while still pouring out grace and holding the belief that everything works out for your highest good.

You have to stop SUCKING at GRACE!

When you do, that’s when you….

Live Your Legacy.

xx Lisa

PS. Have you even checkout my landing page for Money Method yet? Check it out here: moneymethod.ca

Blog.

Why Seeking Validation Is Hurting Your Wealth

Why Seeking Validation Is Hurting Your Wealth

Seeking validation for all your decisions and choices is hurting your wealth.

You are looking to ‘the others’.

The partner, the children, the parents, the society.

God forbid, the banks.

You forgot the emerald rule somewhere along your yellow brick road.

The emerald rule that just passes the golden rule for living.

You are here to be you.

To follow your path.

To listen to your truth.

Not the rest.

The rest of the mortals will get in your head.

They push and we get so tired of holding our own that we allow all their judgments and opinions to take over the whole show in our heads.

Enter: The Gong Show

But I don’t need to tell you this.

You already know you committed the cardinal sin and let in the vampires.

They have been sucking the life right out of you for so long.

They’ve taken up residence in your brain and you can barely hear yourself think, let alone be able to tune in and follow your own gut on what’s right and wrong for you.

Why does this hurt your wealth?

It’s hurting your wealth because if you are looking to others to validate you and your dreams and plans, choices, decisions, etc. (and act upon their recommendations) then you will never stay heading in one direction, you will change directions a hundred times and be pulled in a million different directions, because as we know – 100 people will give you 100 different opinions.

You will have no consistency or persistence in your money goals or any goal for that matter.

You will never make it when you stop, start, stop, change, change, start, flounder, fall, win, stop, start….

It’s a disaster!

Your financial life will be a disaster when you don’t follow through.

Your financial life will be a disaster when you are constantly seeking outside validation and listening to every Charles, Henry, Bob, Tom, Dick and Harry that passes you by. (Just Pick One! Dick is usually good a good choice.)

Well, it doesn’t just hurt your wealth, it also hurts your relationships and if hurting your wallet and heart aren’t bad enough, it also hurts your health.

Being in a regular state of allowing ALL the people to speak into your life – instead of a very select few – creates confusion!

Confusion creates dis-ease in the body.

Cells go WACKY and out of order!

Why not select a chosen few that you absolutely trust, admire, respect, want to emulate?

Like your own personal mastermind in your head.

Do you have your short list?

Is it short enough? Is it focused enough? (This is key!)

And I’m going to be REAL straight with you – many times those people on your short list AREN’T the people closest to us.

Yes, you heard me right.

My short list is very short.

Like 2, 3 if you include Jesus.

But, like, it’s a real short list.

Here’s the other thing.

The people on my short list I have never even met in person (yet)!

They are mentors of mine.

Mentors I absolutely want to be like, in every way!

So, what I’m really saying here is that practically NO ONE can really sway me to get off this path I’ve designed for myself because my mentors don’t even tell me what to do, I just choose to follow them.

(And like I say to all my people, the same that is said to me: You already know your truth, it sometimes just takes connection to others to reveal it to you. That’s all a mentor or coach is anyways – a PERSONAL TRUTH REVEAL MASTER! There’s nothing to be taught. There’s only jewels inside to be uncovered!)

The only time you don’t get to where you want to go is when people pull you off your path OR you haven’t even created a path for yourself in the first place. (Back to my posts on creating Clarity….)

Sometimes you realize that you absolutely need to say

“Thank you but no thank you”

to virtually every well meaning person in your life.

And when you do you get to step back into the driver’s seat and take back your life.

You have to stand up for Y-O-U because no one else will.

Not even your BFF.

You get to make this good.

You get to stop asking for Validation.

So, stop looking for validation through others

and start VALIDATING yourself.

You are the only one who needs your approval.

So buy yourself an “APPROVED” stamp at Staples

and like the “That Was Easy” Button,

take that stamp and APPROVE yourself.

Approve your dreams.

Approve your choices.

Approve your wardrobe.

Approve ALL THE STUFF you chose.

Because it’s great and it make you you.

And when you are you, you most definitely…

Live Your Legacy!

xx Lisa

PS. So, this is what is happening. I’m going to offer you first access to THE WEALTH SPA™ MONEY METHOD!

THE WHAT?!?!

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