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True Release

True Release

If you saw this page right now, thoughts scattered this morning. Even my coffee is scattered, spilled.

Writing about release is very hard. Mostly because it’s handed me my ASSets this month.

I mean some serious releasing stuff. Things I’ve held on to so tight for the last 17 years. (okay, I lied, 18 years – I usually refer back to when I was 20 – it’s a thing and ya’ll know I had a birthday)

Usually, it’s from the way I thought things were supposed to go and guess what, despite my best efforts, have not gone my way.

Which, at the end of the day, is actually pretty okay with me.

Okay, what kind of BS statement was that.

This was not okay.

So much in my life right now is not okay. Not the way I planned.

This is what I actually wrote and then deleted, “I”m an adventure seeker at heart and thrive with new adventures.” Okay, so true, but this isn’t some trip to New York on my own, or a hike in the Rockies, or like the time I manifested a private jet. Those were adventures.

This.

This is the stuff I don’t care for an adventure with. Things that I want to go my way. Things that I have an expected outcome with.

But, life has other plans. God always has other plans.

Plans that usually come and bite you hard in the ass. Maybe God is a Pitbull….

And to be fair, I’m kinda glad He is.

Cause I’m coming out of what is probably the WORST month I’ve ever had in my business for so many reasons.
Totally thrown off my game. I mean, luckily, I have people who can help and I’m sure from the outside everything looks tickity-boo.

But it wasn’t.

There are days I quit. Literally, wanted to disappear.
So I sabotaged.

Queen Sabotager.

Wow, even coming clean with you, to the page, this morning is sobering.

So, back to the country I go, where I go, alone, crawling into my own thoughts, and just sitting there.

Releasing.

Constantly releasing.

Releasing how things should have been.

I “should’ve” been further ahead by now.

Sobering thought when you realize you were further ahead a decade ago – your money, your relationships, your body. (I know MANY of you have been there!)

And then I think about all the friends, clients, mentors, famous people, millions of people – who had it all and then didn’t.

Because I know that life is not a straight up, bottom left to diagonally right type of life.

But I thought it should’ve been.

I wanted that chart. And I still want that nice chart. (Don’t we all?)

And it wasn’t. And it never will be straight up.

You get caught in all the “shoulds”. And all those shoulds get you blocked the EFFFF up, yes, I’m referring to constipation.

And don’t laugh. (okay, you can always laugh, because I think I’m hilarious at times)

Give your head a shake if you don’t think that it’s all connected. All of it.

As we all are.

This is what happens, by the way, when you don’t release and hold on to stuff:

  • you get sick, from cancer to constipation, to massive headaches
  • you hold on to extra weight that even the most perfect diet or exercise regime will not allow you to shed
  • you yell at your kids more
  • you have less patience
  • you get pissed at everything and anyone
  • you get irritated when the tiniest things don’t go your way
  • you get depressed
  • you might drink more or smoke more or find new ways to sabotage yourself
  • you become a total B*TCH – let’s be honest here
  • and the worst thing about all of this holding on – the absolute worst….
  • you laugh less. You don’t laugh at all.

Okay, so here’s my BIG idea. Here’s been my most painful, crying EVERYDAY lesson from the last month.

Stop holding on so tight.

Stop holding on so tight, Lisa. {or insert your name here}

Let it all go.

Cause if you don’t, it will go anyways. So be the one to laugh and let it go.

None of it really matters anyway.

Don’t let your identity get so wrapped up in things that can be taken away from you.

This would be money, stuff, relationships, your body.

Things that can’t be taken away from you: a loving heart, serving others, a big smile for the world.

The rest is all fake, and not worth worrying over. Ya, it hurts your pride like a mother-fucker to fail. Yes, I said it.

It’s true.

But you somehow find the courage to keep on keeping on and facing your life after it hasn’t gone your way.

You adult. You own it. (Damn, that even hurts worse sometimes.)

I got to the point where I literally broke down in laughter. (You get sick of the tears sometimes and the stupid stories you keep telling yourself.)

Sometimes you just have to set your soul free. You have to live in that place where everything you look at turns over a new adventure. Put on the glasses, the filter, the one where everything breathes new hope and where everything that crosses your path is another magical miracle.

Because it is.

  • True Release means the universe can dance with your soul
  • True Release means never having to worry about an outcome
  • True Release means you set yourself free knowing God has your back
  • True Release means you get to happen to life, not life happen to you.
  • True Release allows you to soar, that feeling you get in your dreams when you can fly. (You know that feeling – the one when nothing can stop you. The feeling that you are making a difference, making a contribution, everything in flow, living your life in this most amazing space!)

And you will soar my dear friend. You will always soar in True Release.

xx

Blog.

The World Needs You

The World Needs You

This week 3 of my favorite places closed down: a restaurant close by, a coffee shop and a clothing shop I loved.

I’m heartbroken.

I really loved what these places had to offer: my favorite Arugula & Prosciutto Pizza, the best Spanish Latte ever, and clothes that were 100% me, my style – in other words – black.

Seriously, I totally root for the success all businesses, because if one fails, really, we all lose out.

I really do go through the cycle of grief. Shock, Denial and then I’m very angry at the economy for letting them down or even blame management, even if I have no idea what happened, I make stories up in my head. Acceptance feels like an eternity away.

(Hey, I just lost out on my fav Pizza & Latte – pretty serious stuff emotionally! Now I have to spend all that time trying new restaurants and coffee joints and trying on new clothes {which I hate, if you want to know!} to find my new “love”.  It’s like I’m going to have to kiss a lot of bad pizza’s before I find my one true mozzarella love!)

I’ve been having a hard time with the changing landscape in my industry as well. So many “old” men thinking business can just go on the way it did the last 40-years, and not really clueing into what’s really happening in the world (aka – EVERYTHING is going online), meanwhile, it feels harder and harder than ever to break through the noise when it comes to marketing your products and services.

And even with all the regular stress of business, because we all have it, there’s one thing I want to remind you of (and by you, of course I mean me – cause this be that message I need to hear again and again!)

The world needs you and what special gift you bring to it.

There is no such thing as competition. It can’t exist if you believe in ABUNDANCE. (You seriously can’t believe in both – they are opposites. Think on that!)

Plus, the world really does need your special type of pizza and your clothes, your skin care, your latte, your zany brand of Financial Wisdom.

Don’t let anyone tell you differently.

You make a difference to someone.

Even if you don’t feel like you do.

You do.

xx

 

 

Blog.

Purpose Driven Passion

I have one vow to make to myself today for this new year.

37 was crap if I’m being totally honest with you.

The whole year was like that. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful, I’m blessed and I deepened relationships and made new soul aligned ones as well, expanded my network of amazing humans and lived every day with a smile and deep joy.

AAAAND I sure let myself down – that is why it was not my best year.

And trust me  – there is no worse person to let down than yourself.

And it gets worse!

Way worse when you realize you can’t hide from yourself, dodge your own emails, ignore your own texts, not answer your phone calls, skip out on your birthday, drive away from yourself. Difficult.

I’ve tried.

As it turns out you have to still feed, dress, walk your sorry ASSets around.

I’ve had a rough go lately, and I do take 100% responsibility for it, even if 100% of it was 100% out of my control.

It boils down to this. Integrity with my word with myself.

I haven’t served as many people with my message this year because I didn’t follow through with my word to myself. I haven’t gone ALL out only because I have so many other balls up in the air to keep happy that I totally didn’t do what I was supposed to do.

My juggling act seems to be impressive at times, but ultimately ends in failure when I’m not being true to myself.

Can you relate? Ya, I know you got your balls in the air and on the floor too!

Yet, I still laugh and love and even with those negative thoughts, I’m still choosing to move forward, take action on my dreams, while still sitting with the negative emotions that come, the sadness, the hurt and being okay with it.

I’ve had many moments of deep depression in my life. Almost all of it I can relate back to NOT staying in integrity with my word to myself. (Cause how can you be depressed or mad at yourself when you are in LOVE with yourself and kicking ASSets and living in total integrity with yourself and others? Plus, nothing is worse than rolling over and playing victim.)

And no, I’m not being hard on myself. I knew better. But I kept choosing to put others first – and yes, this includes that crazy thing where I care what people/society/family/friends/LinkedIn actually thinks of me.

Always others first. Keep the peace. Be the middleman. Don’t speak up. Don’t fight. Play nice with others. Don’t rock the boat. Don’t stand for something greater than yourself, because that makes people not like you. (Which again is crazy, cause who cares – you can’t control what people think anyway, this I need to really let go of!)

Some may not see it that way, but I knew that every time I tried to make someone else happy or be the peacemaker,  I choose them over myself. I choose what they think about me over what I think of me and that is probably the worst SIN against yourself. ‘Cause HEAVEN FORBID that I ever stand up for myself really, and every time I broke those agreements with myself it ended up in a DISASTER.

And let’s just say, when your life feels like a disaster in one area of your life, every area of your life follows. It’s how the good ol’ law of attraction works.

And it can all be traced back to one thing. One simple thing.

Choosing Yourself.  Choosing Yourself first.

Listening to yourself. Taking what you need. Being Loyal to your heart, your dreams, your body. Keeping your word to yourself.

Cause here’s the real deal.  You’re gonna naturally be able to give more when you have all that personal sh*t taken care of.

When you can’t take care of yourself you are paralyzed and render yourself completely unable to give back. It sucks. That feeling/state completely sucks and ends up serving NO ONE. Plus you become grouchy and miserable.

One of my coaches, Katrina Ruth, said this week,

“Being 0.01% off alignment is being 100% off alignment.”

God did a fabulous job of showing me that this month! BOOM, BOOM, BOOM, BOOM! (I hit the floor laughing at one point, cause it seemed like a cosmic joke!) I’m a chiropractors dream I’m so much out of alignment with my soul somedays!

But when we realize we are off track by putting others thoughts of us, others ideas, others ideas of how business “should” go, and all the bullshit that society tells us on how to be a good person, “go to university, get married, have some kids, a mortgage and a J-O-B” and all the other completely crazy stuff that really has nothing to do with your soul’s purpose here, we need to course correct.

So many of my friends, women mostly, but men too, have put everyone else’s needs above our own, giving until we are a dry well and it’s hurting us, and it ends up serving no one in the long run.

We need to pull back into alignment. I need to pull back into alignment.

Alignment for those of you who don’t speak “woo-woo” is when your life is in flow, you are doing your souls work and not just doing it for your ego.

Ego Goals, although achievable, never satisfy.

Ego Goals are like showing off at cocktail parties, fun for the moment, but after leave you completely aware that you really know nothing and leave you with a hangover type depression that’s hard to shake.

Purpose-driven Passion Goals usually come along with problem-solving, still aware you know nothing (cause let’s face it, none of us really know anything!), but you can tap into unlimited knowledge & power from source, learn it and make a difference and that will fuel you more than any Ego Goal ever could.

Purpose-Driven-Passion-Soul-Work Goals will nourish and feed and grow you.

Choosing you means choosing your purpose-driven goals. Ego Goals will leave you with 50-letters behind your name by the time you are 50 and you really won’t even really know what half of the letters stand for. I know cause that’s my ego goal, and as of right now, I barely can remember what most of the 19 (going on 22) letters behind my name even mean half the time.

Letters behind your name, like a great resume, like trophy accomplishments (trophy wife, trophy career, trophy cars, trophy homes), like most things in life, really do mean f*ck all. (Not that I’m saying they are bad, in fact, the opposite, however, it’s about the fact they don’t really mean much at the end of the day if your soul is sucked dry…)

Doing your life in a way that serves your soul is the only way to do life.

So that’s my promise to myself this year: choose myself.

Over and over again.

xx

 

PS. And, as for my birthday today, it’s pretty great. I have a beautiful 10-year old and 8-year old making me breakfast. I have my coffee. Facetimed my Mom & Dad. I’m ready to tackle the new year with my blue shovel! Cheers!

 

 

Blog.

Creating Margin

Creating Margin Blog

Margin.

You remember.

When your school teacher said to not write in the margins on your loose-leaf. Leave room for changes.

Really she meant, leave room for the mistakes or the beloved red-pen.

The space between. The boundary. The border. The allowance. The extra. The leeway.

Margin, in investment world terms, is an account created to cover the risk of loss, so sometimes it comes with a negative connotation.

Although, margin is really a saving grace. It can provide the space needed to take advantage of trades that can really boost your portfolio, although, it can do the opposite if not used correctly – like anything in life.

Profit margin in business is a good thing. You need to have that.

How much margin do you have in your life?

How much margin have you created to keep that space in your life for the ups, the downs, and to take advantage of all the wonderful abundance headed your way?

My margin has gone UP and DOWN and many times and in many areas of my life.

Taking time to purposefully create margin in your life will give you space to breathe, create, open your soul & mind to great opportunities that come your way.

And one more thing, sometimes margin gets created by saying “NO”, by creating a perimeter around yourself and choosing yourself first.

Sometimes margin gets created by adding things to your life, like money, or help, or through delegation.

And here’s the crazy CRAZIEST thing that still baffles me every time I create margin in my life – I make room for even more!

It’s like creating margin begets more margin, more space, more room – for everything!

I receive more abundance of time, money, soulmate friends & clients and HAPPY flows into my life.

What do you need to declutter, remove, take away, or add to create margin in your life?

xx

 

 

PS. If you are ready to create some serious margin in your life – you need to check out –> http://financialbliss.ca

 

Blog.

What I Really Want to Teach My Kids

My 9-year-old baby brought me this yesterday morning in bed.

“Happy Easter Mama! This is you first thing in the morning.” She held out an orange plastic Easter egg, with glue eyes and a crooked smile, with pink tentacles.

There are no words…. and what are those pink scraggly things hanging off the bottom of my replicated egg face, I could only assume were…OMG…

“What are those?”

“No, mommy that’s your hula skirt.”

Thank God!

I breathed a sigh of relief. I’ve spent a fortune on chin hair removal only to have them come back and haunt me by my 9-year-old daughter.

Kids are smarter than they look! Even though I may have evaded my dark chin hairs from a 9-year-old artist (for now), there are some things that won’t elude her.

Like how I talk about money around her.

And then it got me thinking.

What do I really want my kids to know about money? I mean besides being responsible with it, and all the same old stuff we try to teach our kids about money (like give, save, spend wisely), or at least pretend to while we are busy bribing them to shut up so we can watch the latest episode of Scandal on Netflix. (Ya, like you’ve never done that….)

So here are a few things I really want to teach them about money and other stuff in life…. (I guess I should send this list to WINNERS so they can print it on canvas so I can hang it above my toilet to be reminded of it everytime I take a….)

1. Build your dreams first.

Make them first. Make them first priority. Don’t put anything above them. Not religion, not your parents, not thoughts on what society tells you to do. God gave your heart a desire and when you follow that and put it first, everything else will fall into place. When you don’t follow that plan, that desire, you end up in a bad place. Bad jobs, bad relationships, bad choices, BAD. And only bad by your definition, not by others. I mean on the surface you made your family happy, you married the right person, got the right education, got the right job, by societies standards – you are a success. But every day, your soul is yearning for more. And in a good way, you are here for a purpose – make sure to live that purpose, and live it to it’s full. You have a message to share with the world. Build your dreams first, or you will be helping someone else build theirs. Look for the win-win-win-win. It’s always there, even if it’s not showing its face yet.

2. You don’t have to work hard for money, but you do need to create loads of value. Money comes easy.

I’ve been under this presumption most of my life. That money is hard to get, you have to bust your ass 9-5 to get it. You don’t. You just have to create value and the money will follow. Create. Solve other people’s problems. Come up with ideas – lots of them and put it out in the world. The more value you create, the more that will follow. We all are allotted the same 24 hours in a day – so we all have the same opportunity to do what Richard Branson has done.

Years ago, I was listening to “The Strangest Secret” by Earl Nightingale and learned what Earl had to say about money, “Our rewards in life will always be in exact proportion to our service.” He was right. I’ve tried to disprove him in my mind a thousand times. I always look for the value. Doesn’t matter what it is in, whether a YouTube star, oil tycoon or drug lord (yes, Netflix again!) But it really doesn’t matter what you do to make money (I mean it’s your choice, and yes, I’m not talking consequences for your actions at the moment, I’m strictly talking value exchange.) If you create value, you have to be compensated for it in some way or another. It’s an irrefutable law. And like the law of gravity, this law can’t be broken. It always wins, and sometimes you need to learn this for yourself. So, create value and money will follow, if that’s what you want. Which leads me to….

3. Anything you believe you can do, you will do.

Sure, you do need tenacity. But tenacity, and persistence, consistency, and all the other characteristics, like clarity, confidence, and courage, will all flow once your belief is unwavering. You must be unwavering. It must be set in stone in your mind. If there is room for doubt, it will crack you – and just like a small leak which will sink a big ship, it will also sink you (or at least take you longer to reach your goals!). There can be no other conflicting beliefs. They must all align. (Man who chases 2 rabbits catches neither! – Chinese Proverb)

I know the reason I’m not where I want to be – way too much self-doubt! This conflicts with everything I’m trying to build. So, unless I get over that, get over myself, and tell all the people in my head (and in my real world!) to pretty much shut up and not allow negativity to crack my ship, then I will never do anything I believe I can do. Once my belief is a part of me, once I’ve accepted it as truth, and when nothing in this world can shake my belief – it shall be done.

Those are 3 things that I really want my kids to know! What are yours?

What is your message? What do you want to leave behind for your kids or the next generation? What were you put here for? If you are serious about your legacy and want to make sure your message gets out to the world instead of getting lost in transition or unclear intentions, you need to set an appointment with me. And let’s make sure you get this message out there.

 

 

 

Blog.

How to Get Killer Confidence!

Yesterday, I was on a coaching call with my life coach, who I’ve been working with for almost 5 years when I realized my problem with confidence.

(Quick Massive Side Note: Any coincidence that my life has literally BLOSSOMED over the last 5 years?!? Maybe it’s time to find someone you trust, like a life coach, to work through all the stuff in your life (health, relationships, business, goal setting, etc.) but only if you are serious about wanting to push through to what you dream is possible for your life and make it a reality, and TRUST me – it’s so good when you do push through because everything you EVER wanted is on the other side of fear! Hear me? Okay, back to today’s post!)

So I’m talking through stuff around my business, and was talking about confidence and why I “feel” I have so much in some areas, but then in other areas, I “feel” I have none. So I asked her,

Where does confidence come from?

So, like any good coach, she turned it back on me. DAMN! I hate answering hard questions.

This is what I’ve come up with, and MAKE NO MISTAKE, this post is written by me for me, but I realize I’m not in this alone and that y’all need some confidence too, in fact, when it comes to money, the reason why most people don’t take financial action is because of their lack of clarity and confidence.

I know how you find clarity.

Clarity comes from taking action. Period.

When you take action, you make decisions, see what feels right, what feels wrong and begin to see and figure out what you want. So to get clarity -take action. Especially important if you are in a state of confusion or you feel you are stuck, taking action will help. Important here is to not let fear of failure stop you, try something and then if it doesn’t work, who cares, you now know that that’s not what you want for your life.

I do know how you find confidence too, I just didn’t ever consciously think about it.

So I searched the Googles and looked up the word confidence, and to my amazement, it read this:

Confidence: the state of feeling certain about the truth of something, or a feeling of self-assurance arising from one’s appreciation of one’s own abilities or qualities

AND THEN BOOM, it hit me.

Confidence is a FEELING and you need to create those FEELINGS inside of you & believe those feelings inside of you to be able to be confident in whatever you do.

Confidence comes from WITHIN!

One of the key ingredients in confidence is knowledge. When you learn and gather information and make sense of it, you gain knowledge and I do believe having knowledge on any given topic gives you the confidence to share that knowledge. In point of fact, I would not have the confidence to speak Mandarin, teach how to make balloon animals, shuck oysters, use Morse code, or to teach how to recognize bird calls (chirp-chirp) because I have not yet learned these things (although, perhaps on my bucket list 😉 )

But then WHY do I not have confidence around the stuff I already know?

It’s because I don’t think I’m worthy enough or smart enough or pretty enough or skinny enough or rich enough, and on and on.

AHHHHH – good ol’ negative self-talk comes back to bite me in the ASSets once more!

So what do we (I) do?

CHANGE YOUR INNER DIALOGUE!

To do that you need to REPEAT CONSISTENTLY through:

  • Mantras
  • Affirmation Statements
  • Prayer
  • Meditation
  • Declarations

And most importantly, do it all with BELIEF. You need to believe your inner voice. You need to shut out the noise of other’s voices in your head and really believe that God/the Universe has your back.

Changing the thoughts around your confidence will in time give you the belief you need to create the feeling of confidence, which will lead you to action and then to your desired results!

Do whatever you need to to do re-frame that inner negative self-doubting talk and do it fast, so you can stand in confidence with what you were put on this earth to do!

You were created to have all the confidence in the UNIVERSE to KNOCK IT OUT OF THE EFFING PARK! 

So, knock it out of the park!

 

If you want to create confidence and clarity around your money, and this is resonating with you around the topic of YOUR MONEY, then it’s time to work with me closer on this.  I have MANY ways you can work with me from 1:1 coaching, to my online money makeover course teaching you all about your money so you can create the feeling of confidence within you.  You can email me directly at lisa@ellementsgroup.com or check out my course at moneymakeoveronline.com