I think we get success and happiness confused many times.
We’ve somehow received the message that success and happiness go hand-in-hand – that you can’t have one without the other.
I’m guilty of this.
So many times I think my happiness is based on my success or past accomplishments.
I think my self-worth many times is based on the stuff I did or didn’t do.
Which, by the way, has proven itself as a horrible place to live and ends up manifesting in your life as a mire of depression and disease.
Been there, done that, got the T-shirt – BUT I still really haven’t got the message.
There are big differences between success and happiness.
The thing about success is that you can have huge successes and be miserable.
Success doesn’t guarantee happiness.
Many countless people in history, who successfully impacted and changed the world or had all the money in the world still lived a miserable existence. Howard Hughes comes to mind.
Happiness, on the other hand, does not require success.
You can be happy just by choice.
No success needed. No money needed.
We all know that once you reach a goal there sometimes comes a success-hangover. An ending. Sometimes sadness or depression.
In fact, it’s such a real thing to not want to start the whole process again that we actually have fear of accomplishing our big goals.
Because we won’t know what to do after we have reached our goal.
It’s new territory.
We don’t know what danger lies once we reach the top of the mountain.
So what do we do?
I’ll tell you what I do in spades.
I self-sabotage all my goals.
You have to understand this – I really do live my dream life.
I’m also a super happy person and laugh easily.
I sleep like a baby (maybe more like a teenager!)
I love all aspects of my life right now.
I’m super healthy – no medications, no issues, etc.
So, why would I self-sabotage?
I think partly because I can’t see past the goal.
I think things like this:
–> Does life end when you reach your big goals? Seriously, do you just roll-over and die or worse RETIRE?
–> Or, do I have to go out and start a new goal once I accomplish the old goal and go through all this “growth crap” again? Yuck.
–> Add in a little superstition, such as, ‘my life can’t really go from this good to that AMAZING without the rest of my life falling to complete sh*t’.
–> Then there is the simple fact that I’ve spend my adult life creating these neural pathways that pretty much have deeply ingrained in me the “struggle” or the “striving” which has become now super comfortable to me – which are some beliefs that I’ve been deeply working on reprogramming!
–> Self-Talk which ends up sounding like ‘it’s hard to (fill in the blank) make money, lose weight, eat healthy, have kids, find a partner, etc’.
So the struggle stays real my friends, but only because I keep it real in my mind.
We insistently keep choosing the struggle.
It’s like we beat ourselves daily.
And then there comes the point, the big question.
Why go after big goals?
Why go after success if you are happy already?
AND there it is…
My million dollar question.
Why go after BIG GOALS if you are happy already?
What can accomplishing a big goal do for your happiness factor if you already are super happy with your life?
I’ve researched this, asked this and studied this and have come up with this answer.
Life is meant to move forward.
Life is meant to increase.
Your soul is going through this human experience to experience growth.
Growth – as in – that is the ultimate goal.
And if growth is the ultimate goal or purpose of life, then how do we measure growth?
In measuring growth, who or what do we have to compare ourselves to?
And there is only one answer.
Only the past you.
The you yesterday.
That’s your only real benchmark.
The rest of the people, the rest of your external experiences are here to help you grow.
All the people in your path, the people that trigger you, the people that love you, the people that hate you, the people that inspire you –
That is the only purpose they serve.
Your experiences SERVE UP growth.
Think about this:
The only purpose your thoughts serve is for growth, for increase.
And growth is happening with or without you on board.
The ship has left the harbour.
You basically have no choice in the matter.
So fight me on this all you want.
I think where the gold lies in life is to be in a place where you gratefully accept this and take on the challenge – this game of life- with all the fervor and splendor of a small child – full of wonder.
To be able to take on your past self and intentionally create a new beautiful, amazing, powerful you, a little better everyday.
1% at a time.
Grow in the direction your soul is calling you to grow.
Set the intentions and follow through.
Learn to have your own back.
Create your own personal success definition and choose happiness in that.
Which really means…
Live YOUR Legacy.
PS. If you want to get your life on track, organized and make sure you’ve covered all your bases financially – OR if you want to GROW your wealth – then you need to book and appointment with me and WEALTH SPA™! Go to wealthspa.ca!