IT’S ALL ABOUT THE WANT
This isn’t your typical post on determining your needs vs. wants crap.
And yes, I think it’s crap. Well, a bunch of hooey anyways. (I’m not even sure what hooey is, but let’s go with it for a minute.)
I always got so frustrated when you had to set a budget and determine your needs and wants. Have you ever had to do one of those exercises?
First of all, it’s boring as Hell. (Assuming Hell is boring – but in actuality, I’m sure it’s a collection of fascinating individuals…. I digress….)
Second of all, it’s freakin’ impossible to decide what is a need and what is a want when you are doing a budget.
Like, I really do need these shoes, and I really can live without the _____(fill in the blank: toaster, toilet cleaner, milk for my children)_____. My kids don’t need breakfast anyways or socks for that matter.
So, needless to say making a budget or those stupid exercises where you have to determine your NEEDS VS. WANTS are totally annoying and crap – and now I finally have proof and something that made me scream YESSSSS (SALLY STYLE)!!
Welcome to my A-HA moment!
I was reading The Law of Attraction – yes, another book on manifesting – as I tend to do in my “spare” time and I came upon this paragraph on needs vs. wants. For the first time in all my financial life this finally makes sense and I can tell those budget/needs vs. wants financial planning tools to take a hike!
Here is what it read:
Just as the difference between positive emotion and negative emotion can sometimes be very subtle – the difference between wanting and needing can be very subtle.
When you are focusing upon what you want, your Inner Being {however you define that} offers you positive emotion. When you are focusing upon what you need, your Inner Being offers you negative emotion because you are not focused on what you want. {Instead}, you are focused upon the lack of what you want. …
… When you are feeling a positive emotion, you are attracting into your experience that which you want. When you are feeling a negative emotion, you are attracting into your experience that which you do not want.
Think of it like this:
The word NEED has a slight negative or full out negative connotation to it.
“I need to go to work.” “I need to buy groceries.” “I need to make dinner.”
Do you feel how those come off negative?
The word WANT has a slight positive or full out positive connotation to it.
“I want to go to Disneyland.” “I want that red handbag.” “I want to play with my dog.”
See, those sentences feel lighter and positive. The word WANT stirs up so many dreams inside of you and that is a positive thing!
Then it hit me like a bolt of coffee…
I need to pay my bills. I need to return this email. I need to take the car in for an oil change. I need…. I need…. I need…. and I would fill up my whole day with NEEDING to do stuff. Blah.
Life = A long, boring list of things to get done.
I need (okay, bear with me!) to start WANTING the life that I have or make changes in my life. I do love my life and even saying, “I want to pay my bills” for example, brings about gratitude and a bit of excitement. I have money. I have bills. I have electricity and water and a car to pay for. These are true blessings. I also want to buy food and I love going to work! I want my life!
Here’s the other thing for any of you woo-woo people (okay, this whole post is woo-woo really!): needing brings about a scarcity or lack mentality and because wanting offers us a positive emotion it actually brings about an abundance mentality, such as gratitude. (Chew on that for a minute!)
We make ourselves out to be such martyrs in our society with all the things we NEED to do and we feel GUILT when we WANT. (Yes, I’m preaching to the MOM CHOIR!)
What if it was okay to want and then to eliminate the word need in your daily life? How would your life look if you wanted to return emails, pay bills, save money, make dinner, spend time with family?
BOTTOM LINE: Let yourself want your life. Try and eliminate the word need. You don’t need to do anything. Wake up with a bounce in your step and WANT the crap out of the life you have chosen for yourself.
