Giving and receiving. Seems simple right?!
Do you feel like you’re a fabulous giver? You could give the shirt off your back (as long as you were wearing your good bra that day), you always sign up for volunteering and you are ready to help any charity that comes along. Then you are a graceful giver.
Have you given much thought to how you receive? Are you a graceful receiver, or does the act of receiving strike a funny chord deep-down with you and make you feel kinda unworthy or uncomfortable inside?
Receiving of gifts, compliments and money are 3 areas that women struggle with.
Recently, I was given a compliment by 2 women I really admire and respect. They had given me a compliment on my gift as a speaker, and how I was great in front of the camera. THIS MADE ME CRAZY! I hate myself in video. Still photography – no problem – they can touch that crap up! But video: sees all, hears all, and NO MAGIC TOUCHUPS (well, there’s no iPhone app for that yet!). I gave an awkward laugh, and turned around immediately, walked physically away from these women, and changed the subject completely. They both stopped me and made me come back and acknowledge the compliment. Seriously, they called me out on my receiving crap! I’m so grateful they did! I felt completely unworthy of that compliment at the time.
I also feel unworthy when people compliment my writing. I feel I have no special gift in this area, and probably because I got a D in College English (and struggled in English all through elementary and high school!) and begged the professor to pass me so I could get on with life, vowing I would never write. She agreed and so did I. It seemed like a fair deal. I feel because I never took a writing class that I’m not worthy of being called a writer. Now, I know that’s bull – but it’s also taken a good few years to grow into those shoes! I’m finally starting to receive compliments on my writing.
When I compliment other women on their gifts and strengths, I now notice them shy away – be it through body language or words – too many times to count. Why is it so hard for us as women to really acknowledge our strengths and gifts when they are pointed out to us?
Our Canadian roots have trained us to be GIVERS! Look around, do you think it’s a fluke we live in a such a wonderful country? We give. We help. We share. We’ve been taught, and we’ve been taught well from our ancestors. We have this whole giving thing down pat for the most part (yes, I know we can always give more, but giving isn’t a foreign concept to most of us!)
Receiving is part of the giving/receiving equation. As far equations go, it is required both sides of the equal sign are, well, equal.
The natural laws of the universe, and the Bible for that matter, do say that you reap what you sow. The compliments you give you will get in return. Maybe not right away, but you will. The loving gifts you sow you do reap at different points in time. Law of attraction isn’t just for material things. All things fit into the ebb and flow of giving and receiving.
What you put out into the universe does come back to you like a boomerang.
Why are we as women such martyrs when it comes to receiving? Why do we always have to be the givers?
I know it feels good to give.
I know it is good to give.
I know you are a pro-giver.
I’m not saying don’t give.
Here’s the thing – when you don’t receive or you don’t know how to receive gifts well: You take the joy away from the giver!
Have you ever given a physical gift and then had someone reject it for whatever reason? Doesn’t that feel crappy? You feel like a failure in so many ways!
Same goes with compliments and money. Receive it!
When you receive you are giving the gift of JOY to the giver!
I know I have a HARD time receiving money. FYI – This is not good for business – like it took a brain surgeon to figure that out! I want to do everything for FREE! SO RIDICULOUS, right! Deep down I do want to help everyone, and that’s good, however, I also know, I can help more people once I can nail down this whole receiving thing! 😉
Massive MONEY BLOCK for me. Maybe you know what I mean. You always want to make sure you’re the giver, not the taker. That you are giving more value than you are receiving back. That people will speak of you as such an amazing giver, and not as some business or person that “ripped” you off. (There comes my old friend “people-pleaser” again – I thought he went on a permanent vacation in Tahiti….guess not….) I would HATE to be a person that only takes or that people think is greedy or that “ripped” someone off! However, I take it to the extreme. It’s okay to still make money and not “rip” people off, or get money in exchange for the value you are providing. (That last sentence is for all my fellow women entrepreneurs – cause I know I ain’t alone on this one!)
Where do you struggle with receiving? Do you feel unworthy to receive over and above your basic necessities of life? Do you feel you have to work hard and earn everything yourself? Is receiving of gifts, money or compliments hard for you?
You are WORTHY OF ABUNDANCE! I’m speaking that into your life my friend! Say it again, say it out loud, shout it out:
I AM WORTHY OF ABUNDANCE, COMPLIMENTS & GIFTS!
BOTTOM LINE: Next time you receive, say “Thank-you, I receive that.” and pause a moment to really let that gift or compliment sink in. Remember that by receiving you give the gift of JOY to the giver of your gift!
